So there I am, driving along in my boyfriend’s car (which he is so kind as to lend me whenever I choose to drive rather than take the train to work), smiling at all of the Little Faces out for their morning walks, singing along to Lady Gaga (Teeth), you know, generally minding my own [...]
I hate a lot of things. Besides the obvious things like Speidi, sex offenders, and people who do bad things to children, puppies and/or trees; I hate lots of random things too. So for lack of a more productive use of this Toolbag Wednesday, I’ve compiled a list for you, which also makes this the [...]
I haven’t posted in a week. I’ve been stewing over something that I’m not exactly sure how to appropriately articulate, and lo and behold it has to do with another one of my friends.
There we sat, discussing a friend of a friend and the outlandish lengths she’s gone to in order to meet “someone,” expanding [...]
I don’t like buying toilet paper. It’s necessary, yes. But it’s also expensive and stupid and it’s such a waste. Also, I think it’s embarrassing.
I once saw this girl on the sidewalk, walking all purposeful, with her arms wrapped around an ungainly pack of toilet paper. I was with my boyfriend and we were having [...]
Can someone please explain to me what the hell a “Couples Shower” is? Because I just don’t even know anymore.
My friend Mara, the same one who got married in all kinds of annoying ways, who went AWOL after ascending to the state of wifedom, and who is now in the family way; has sent me a [...]
After the snarkfest that was my earlier post this week (thank you Internets for the healthy debate), I’ve decided rather than add to it, I’ll leave you instead with a recap of the Toolbaggery of 2009.
Note: Toolbag Wednesdays 1-16 (circa 2008) can be found under “toolbaggery” and include such gems as After-the-Fact Boys, [Expletive] Blagojevich, The [...]
It really is never ending, people. And I just don’t understand it.
I go to Victoria’s Secret. I get fitted for a bra (don’t get too excited boys- no nudity or boob fondling is involved), which is generally a sad experiment because each attempt seems to yield a different result. 32B. 34A. 34B. Triumph! They’re getting [...]
