SQUEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay. I’m done being giddy. For now. Sorry I’m not sorry.

….so as part of the registration process, you’re asked to list 5 things about yourself that others going to BiSC absolutely must know (check out my 5 and all the other amazing bloggers who are going here). I kind of struggled with my list again this year, but ultimately chose to keep it simple: Wendy, Anglophile, Wine, Liz Lemon, and Swearing. That pretty much sums up “me.” But, the more I think about it, the more I realize there are a few other things that I could have added:

1) I’ve always wanted to be a fireman. Like really really bad. One time when I was 8 or 9, I got picked out of all the kids in my class to be the one who got to hold the front of the fire hose during some kind of come-to-think-of-it-probably-unsafe firehouse relay race summer fun day we had at my elementary school. Except it never came to fruition because my parents packed my brothers and I away to Disney World in the back of our un-air-conditioned station wagon with wood paneling on the sides instead.

So…I guess I’m keeping that dream alive? In truth, I’d probably be a terrible fireman because no way could I climb up a ladder without freaking out about the height…BUT I’m not afraid of fire and am kind of a pyro when it comes to making one, I’m super good at making chili, I can drive like a mo fo so I’d be great at driving the fire truck (especially using the horn), and I’d be super awesome at taking care of the fire house’s Dalmatian (because I don’t care what anyone says, every fire station HAS A DALMATION DAMMIT). 

2) I recently upgraded my cable package just so I can get The Science Channel. For real. This conversation actually (or thereabouts) happened:

Me: “Hi. I’d like to pay you all of my monies to upgrade to whatever non-affordable cable package you offer that includes The Science Channel.”

Comcast: “Great! I can help you with that right now!”

Computer sounds: Bleep bloop beep bop bleep bloop bleep….

Comcast:“Excellent! I’ve upgraded your account and you will now have 387 additional channels that you’ve never heard of nor will ever watch, as well as The Science Channel!”

Me: “Fantastic! In HD?”

Comcast: “You better believe it! Best of all, it’ll only be $50 more a month for your preferred package!”

Me: “Ah snap! Now I will once again know How It’s Made, where Mantracker is, what’s odd on Oddities, and what Karl Pilkington’s Ricky-Gervais-Defined Bucket List amounts to! Yahtzee!”

And scene.

3) I’ve been a strong proponent of the use of the word “fancy” for a number of years now. In fact, I take an annoying ownership of its growing popularity. I started it all dammit! (You know, in the same way that Al Gore invented the Internet. Because yeah, that happened.) 

Please be forewarned: I will call you “Fancy” because in addition to its adjective properties, it is also my go-to term of endearment.

BTW- in case you were wondering, the opposite of “fancy” is “rural.” Which I can totally say because I grew up only a block away from corn and soybean fields. The worst. 

4) Last year, I was THE LAST BISC-uit TO LEAVE VEGAS. While I’d like to claim my love of BiSC as the impetus for this distinction (see: my full recap), the truth is a bit more dubious than that.

Remember the Joplin, Missouri tornado? That was happening while I naively waited out my flight delay by getting a pedicure in the Vegas airport. And then, all the flights east were canceled, including mine. For all my traveling, speed walking, and dialing savvy, I was unable to get another flight out…for TWO WHOLE DAYS. So I holed up at the airport La Quinta (incidentally the most expensive hotel I stayed at in Vegas, including the Bellagio!), dead broke, and managed to acquire I-can’t-leave-the-bathroom-for-more-than-30-minutes-altogether FOOD POISONING the night before my second attempt to leave Vegas.

When the time came to check out of the hotel, I was loaded up on Alka seltzer, Immodium, and Drammine. I managed to get through security without being wanded or detained and proceeded to the gift shop where I purchased more alka seltzer and a ceramic “Sin City!” mug in which to sip it over the span of an hour. There I sat at my gate in my jammies with my sunglasses on like some kind of Lohan-wannabe douchebag, smelling of sickness and financial insolvency, freaking out because in less than 12 hours I had movers scheduled to move me out of my apartment in Chicago and I was not yet finished packing. Which is when I saw the toe nail on the carpeting. Which is also when I felt grateful there was no longer anything in my stomach with which to react.

This is what happens when you stay too long in Vegas.

Here’s hoping for a less auspicious ending to BiSC 2012! And here’s hoping I’ll be the lucky blogger who wins the contest for one BiSC participant to go for free courtesy of Paperd, the prettiest little custom wallpaper app for the iPhone and iPod Touch (launching this February).

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But…

As I wile away the hours at work or on the couch with one Miss Wendy Lou Who, I know that this solitude is temporary. I’m getting out there and making more plans with friends again. I’m settling into my new place and figuring out what kind of kitchen table I want and where to hang things on the walls. I’m trying. I haven’t given up.

And as for boys? Well, I may be more cynical than is right or good for someone with my deep-rooted romantic longings, but I still believe in love. I may criticize, poke fun, question, doubt, and heckle; but underpinning all of that is the desire to be with my own special someone. To flirt. To catch his interest and hold it. To be kissed. To be touched. To tumble into bed. To feel love. To be loved.

And I will. This Christmas, I may be single again, but who knows where next Christmas will find me?

I’ll allow that such a sentiment may seem “hopeful,” but in fact it’s more simple than that. This single girl’s heart recognizes the inevitability that someone who wants to love and be loved someday will find it. Again.

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Well, to you I say in no uncertain hyperbolic terms, what is life without a turkey craft?!? And a LIZ LEMON turkey craft at that!

This year, my turkey is singing the theme song for Cheezy Blasters into her wine glass while working on her Night Cheese and shuffling along on a treadmill at 2 mph. Meat Cat and some teamster subs were good enough to make cameos! Thanks Meat Cat! (If you don’t know what any of this is referring to, then I don’t know if we can be friends anymore. Oh, just go watch 30 Rock!)

You're my hero, Liz Lemon!

Pinch crafting for Fancy this year was the tag-team crafting duo of my mom and grandma. From where I sit, both created equally disturbing and cracked out turkeys…

My mother: for her sudden can’t-miss-it interest in football and references to “The Game” and some Packer football player she called “Trusty.”

Football is stupid. The end.

And my grandmother: for her…um…well…just take a look and tell me if that shit isn’t cracked out. Is this what happens to us when we get old?

I have no words. No words.

I hope you enjoy our “craftiness” and that you had a fantastic Turkey Day!

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She takes after her mom in the "activity" department.

Okay, so maybe I’m not the most athletic of persons (I may have misspelled athletic before spell checking this post). And okay, sure, neither is my dog, Wendy. But, what better way can she and I support the local animal shelter than to participate in their 8K run/ 4K walk later this month? Yes, you read that right. We’re going to actually exercise…in the name of charity!

PAWS, for those of you not already familiar, is Chicago’s largest no-kill animal shelter and is where I adopted Wendy last Christmas. She was one of the dogs featured in their “Twelve Strays of Christmas” last December. The moment I saw her picture online with those damn inquisitive eyes of hers, the moment I began to brainstorm names for her, I knew I was going there straightaway after work. I can’t believe it’s been nine months since that fateful day!

In that time, not a day has gone by that I haven’t marveled at just how well suited Wendy and I are for each other. Besties! Soul mates! And not a day has gone by that I haven’t felt grateful to PAWS for saving her from the city’s animal control where she’d been taken after being captured as a stray. Some things really are just meant to be.

Together, Wendy and I plan to walk in gratitude to and in support of PAWS on September 25 in their annual fundraiser, Run for Their Lives. All money we raise will go toward PAWS Chicago’s targeted spay/neuter, innovative adoption, and community outreach programs. If you can, please support Wendy and I by donating toward our goal of $1000. We, along with the doggies and kitties of Chicago, thank you for whatever you can give.

Also, there’s going to be a costume contest and we will be participating! Right now, I’m thinking Snow White, but there’s also a cute sailor dress I have my eye on. I promise pictures to those who donate!

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The other day, someone asked me what I did over the weekend. After thinking long and hard (TWSS), I realized holy fuck. I had bacon on three separate occasions within 24 hours (on a burger, straight from the frying pan & sans eggs, and in my mac and cheese). I continued to think long and hard about whether to actually share this feat. Would it be worse to plead forgetfulness to hide my shame (“Oh, yeah, this weekend? I think I took a nap…or something?”) or proudly parade my inadvertent Bacon Fest 2011? Decisions decisions…

During the 20SB Summit, I found myself joking A LOT about being “grandfathered-in” to the community. Joking. But utterly serious. I belong dammit. Don’t you question me, you young whipper-snappers! Never mind that the term “grandfathered-in” bespeaks all things crotchety and old.

I now live in fear of the kidney stone redux that the Internet tells me I am 95% likely to experience in my lifetime. My fear is not so great that I will give up drinking tea or choosing soy milk however. 

I recently realized that I put my underroos on inside out. It was 3 o’clock in the afternoon. I shrugged and continued to wear them that way. I should add that this was the second time in a week I’d been bested by the challenges of wearing one’s clothing right side out. Holla!

During one of my awesomesauce insomnia bouts, I wound up googling “dog ate a silverfish now what” to find out if that’s bad. I went on to wonder if the presence (or previous presence as it were) of said silverfish on the tile floor meant that the dude and I are slobs who live in squalor. Are we “dirty people”? [BF: Yo, if you're reading this, don't answer that because we both know the answer but they don't.]

I am genuinely considering getting a red streak put into my hair later this week. Because, why not? I dye my hair brunette as it is, have for years, but am thinking it could use a little something. Like a streak of fire engine red! I mean, if you can’t dye a red streak into your hair at 31, when can you? #RedStreakFTW!

This conversation happened at work the other day…. Emo: “I can’t believe I showered for this.” Me: “Don’t worry; I didn’t.” And scene.

What can I say? This is what it’s come to….I’m clearly living The Dream. And my thirties? All they’re cracked up to be. Obviously.

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Many thanks to animalcrackers' circus for use of her photo!

Last weekend, I threw together a little meet up for some local bloggers, many of whom I’ve been reading for years and had yet to meet in person! With everyone’s busy schedules- especially over the summer months, there just never seems to be an opportunity to get together! So, I created one. Our own unofficial version of a Chicago Blogger Meet-up/ Tweet-up.

I created an Evite and sent it along to some local bloggers I’m lucky enough to already count as friends and to those bloggers and twitterati I’d been long overdue to meet. I admit, I checked the RSVPs religiously. And of course, I auditioned no fewer than six outfits, finally deciding on a $22 tank dress from Forever 21.

As the event drew near and in lieu of being able to secure a drink special or deal, I planned to give away a bottle of Mumm Napa sparkling wine (my favorite from Napa!). That afternoon, as my cab raced a Chicago rainstorm to Pops for Champagne, I was excited, yes, but nervous too. What if no one ended up coming? I consoled myself with a half-kidding, “Well, then I’ll just drink ALL OF THE CHAMPAGNE!”

Lucky for me- and for the champagne- the unofficial Chicago Blogger Meet/Tweet Up was larger than a party of one and included @SaraLang, Punch It In!, Dysfunction Junction, A Day in the Life, Full of Snark, animalcrackers’ circus, and @shefmeansflower (who we peer pressured onto twitter right then and there).

Together, we passed the hours drinking and talking. About, you ask? Well, we talked about Caryn’s recent engagement and cruise, our various odd illnesses that make us sound like a bunch of 80 year olds, the Field Museum and how their whale exhibit is sad because all of the animals are dead but the Shedd’s “whale encounter” is epic and financially taunting, we discussed Jeremy Wade (“biologist and extreme angler”) and how kickass River Monsters is- hello, they have episodes called “Man Eater” and “Death Ray,” and we laughed at the apparent hilarity that would be a notarized break up letter. Annnnnd that’s the extent of my “notetaking” skills as we broke into our second bottle! Ladies, what did I forget to include?

Thank you again for coming out in a rainstorm and for making my first ever Chicago Blogger Meet/Tweet Up a success!

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Wendy, modeling the versatility of Samsonite’s comfy, padded interior.

I’ve been commuting to my job for six years next month (umm, wow…really? Where have the years GONE?!), during which time I’ve put a number of bags to the test. I’ve tried the two-fer: the purse and work bag double whammy (too much to carry). I’ve given the messenger bag a go (not enough room for a change of shoes, lunch, and everything else without looking like I’m hauling a small child). Eventually though, I found a happy medium with the now ubiquitous Longchamp Le Pliage large zip-top tote bag (in Billberry and with the As Seen on TV Kangaroo Keeper to organize the gigantressness of the bag itself- can NEVER find my keys!).

But then a couple of weeks ago, I was given the opportunity to try out a backpack from Samsonite’s new line- although I have one of their pieces of luggage, which I love and would recommend, I wasn’t aware they had backpacks too. But oh do they ever (and FYI, they’re on sale here until August 31)!

When I began carrying the Samsonite Tectonic backpack during my daily commute, the first thing I immediately noticed was how freely I was able to get around, even running after the bus and hopping on an earlier train! Can you imagine?

Even though I’d loaded every inner and side pocket and zip-close pouch with my nomadic accoutrements, I found that the weight of the bag was more evenly distributed compared to my over the shoulder and messenger bags. In fact, I actually felt lighter and promptly demonstrated said lightness by evoking various “superstar” poses à la Mary Katherine Gallagher to the dude also known as my boyfriend. Over the top perhaps, but this bag single-handedly has made my 3 hour round trip daily commute easier and much less of a strain.

Aesthetically, I think this backpack fits within my lifestyle remarkably well. I find that the backpack is sporty while also maintaining a professional appearance. Some of the other backpacks I’ve seen people carrying around look like they’re part of an outer space program! Seriously, what is that all about anyway? Still other backpacks are a bit “much”- I’m only going to work, so why do I need to look like I’m heading out on a 12 day expedition to the Arctic Circle?  

This is certainly not one of those bags! It’s compact and sleek in black with grey padding and mesh fabric accents on the straps (it is available in three colors however). I particularly like that they chose orange for the thread, zipper pull, and logo accents. A small but nice touch that someone like me appreciates.

Overall, the zippers themselves are sturdy- especially the closure for the laptop pocket, the straps have a thoughtful rounded opening at the end to cinch the backpack to your shoulders and can be used to rest your thumbs in while walking, there’s an extra padded top handle, and durable utilitarian fabric (that withstood an accidental soaking after toppling under one of the automatic faucets in the work bathroom- long story).

Since I’ve completely made the switch to this backpack, I decided to “jazz it up” and make it my own with a few little buttons… one from CHIRP Radio (which I’ve become a bit of a groupie of thanks to the dude’s extensive involvement with them), a foursquare “swarm” badge because I’m completely addicted to checking in, and an ampersand that I picked up at Longman & Eagle during @bayjb’s birthday dinner last August because I liked it’s simplicity- though the food I decidely did not care for (Jess, can you believe it’s been a year already?). Of course, my most favoritest must-have accessory of all is Wendy. She loves the new bag too, and promptly fell asleep shortly after our photo shoot commenced.

Beyond using the backpack for work, I intend to put it to good use during upcoming bike rides (the new bike- I went with red- is here at last!), trips to the dog beach with Wendy (girl can’t go to the beach without her towel!), and maybe even to the @20SB Summit next week (I have no idea what to bring so why not everything?).

So tell me, do you commute to work? Take public transportation regularly? What bags do you like/ recommend?

**Please note that while Samsonite provided me with this backpack free of charge, my review and all of the subsequent opinions and recommendations contained therein are my own and given without compensation. I just like a good product when I see one! 

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