Tuesday, April 20th, 2010
Something is happening with my dad. Overtures have been made. A phone call here or there. An email. A text. A question that asks “Are you happy? I hope that you’re happy.” An invite for lunch when he’s in town for a business meeting. He’s trying, but it’s all very peculiar.
My heart isn’t necessarily hardened [...]
Filed under: card games hurt my feelings, childhood, crossroads, cutting, depression, family matters, in memory, people should be nicer to each other, quiet desperation, things people say, wakefulness by Nic
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Monday, April 12th, 2010
I never rebelled growing up. I’ve always been a reliable, “good” daughter. And yet, the verbal maneuvering and emotional posturing of my mother is resulting in a late twenties rebellion.
Our phone conversation last night began innocuously enough. How’s work, what did you do this weekend, how was the movie, let’s plan Mother’s Day, and the [...]
Filed under: "work", WTF, childhood, crash and burn, cutting, depression, family matters, going postal, mothering, my boyfriend is a saint, no jokes, people should be nicer to each other, questionable attire, so what if i scream?, things people say by Nic
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Monday, March 30th, 2009
“What are these?” he asked as the faintest grey light began to peek through the window panes. It was quiet still, before coffee pots would be filled and church goers would gather. Laying naked, my arm comfortably resting on his chest, he softly traced the pale lines of my forearm with his fingertips. I was [...]
Filed under: childhood, crash and burn, cutting, depression, in memory, knowing, quiet desperation, singletons, the sex, things people say, wakefulness, work in progress by Nic
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Wednesday, December 20th, 2006
I read a quote from Peter Sellers today: “There used to be a real me, but I had it surgically removed.”
How do I write about this? Why do I feel compelled to do so?
Lately, I’ve felt as though I’ve disappeared. Like the real me has been folded up, wrapped in tissue paper, and stored in [...]
Filed under: cutting, depression, work in progress by Nic
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