Nic Narrates

About a week ago, I got an email from a guy I used to date….THREE YEARS AGO. We haven’t had any contact since we stopped seeing each other, and then, poof! I get one of those “I was cleaning up some of my old emails and happened by this one… so I thought I’d drop you a note and see how you are.” And then there was the postscript: “It was anything but easy to put you behind me; and, truth be told, I still think about you and how you are.” The hell?

Emo says he’s having a High Fidelity moment, the meaning of which presently escapes me, while the boyfriend (oh, how I need to name him herein!), to his immense credit, was less-than-concerned or jealous. As for me, well, my ego was effectively stroked (how could it not be?) and I felt good about being the kind of person to whom an email like this would be sent. But, other than registering his accurate grammar usage, I was left feeling utterly…flat.

We dated for six or seven months-spring to fall, in which time he proved to be a nice enough guy who, let’s face it, served his purpose at that point in my life. He showed me what respect and equality in a relationship can look and feel like. But when summer ended, so did whatever “we” were doing and I haven’t much thought about it since. That is, I certainly don’t hold any unrequited feelings toward him- toward anyone.

And yet, I began this blog while we were dating and I think that my return to writing during that time somehow counts for something. But, despite any vague intentions, I keep forgetting to draft a reply. Which leads me to believe that sometimes saying nothing says everything.

Filed under: anyone out there?, blogging about blogging, crossroads, must be a sign, this is now, write on by Nic