Nic Narrates

HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND?

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did you hear that Internets? That was the sound of my screeching into the phone as I was told someone updated his status on FACE-FUCKING-BOOK. On Valentine’s Day.

Two weeks ago, he told me “The distance is really getting to me….I don’t want to feel like I’m living two lives…I still think you’re amazing and you make my life FEEL COMPLETE (!!!!)….if only you were here, this wouldn’t be happening…” Blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah.

A more complete/ accurate break up chat (you know, one that lasts more than EIGHT MINUTES on THE PHONE) might have included something like, “I think I’ve met someone.”

A little bit of honesty like that might have made this a lot easier, might have spared me a couple of days of furtive searches for a new viable income, a new apartment, even how much a U-haul would cost to get me there. It might have saved me from fruitlessly hoping things could turn out differently.

While I spent my time believing what he told me, feeling sad about a situation that couldn’t be helped, respecting his privacy at home and at work, and ultimately penning a very tactful and heartfelt letter instead; he spent it pretending the girl he’s “crazy about” doesn’t exist anymore, gallivanting about town (and on Facebook, I’m told) with his new valentine. Sweet.

I’ll spare you my Is-This-Other-Woman-Shit-Seriously-Fucking-Happening-To-Me-Again rant and my You-Were-Falling-For-Me-And-Have-A-New-Girlfriend-In-Two-Weeks-What-Is-This-Junior-High sob song, and simply say I don’t feel so bad for writing this anymore.

I just wish the letter I wrote him was written with a full understanding of why it ended.  I wish that it also served as a natural end to any further discussion of him on this blog. And I wish the result of the last six years of dating wasn’t making me feel so disposable inside.

Filed under: boys suck, break ups suck more, crash and burn, dirty laundry, going postal, hateful, haterade, jaded, people should be nicer to each other, poor choices, singletons, so what if i scream?, things people say, toolbaggery, wakefulness, WTF by Nic