So, yeah, the economy is running on hamsters.
People are getting rid of their pets because they can’t afford to keep them anymore (for a nominal fee, wouldn’t that be a great present? Especially given the circumstances). There apparently was a run on Uno at Target this year because it was completely sold out at the [...]
Seeing as this is likely the last Toolbag Wednesday of the year for me, I wanted to take this opportunity to rehash the Toolbags of yore. There were guppies and racists, pregnant smokers and salt and vinegar chips, and there were those who almost but not quite made the list. The honorable mentions included the [...]
Okay, so I admit I haven’t always been a good girl this year. But if you give presents for effort, please consider the following:
Charcoal grey Ugg(ly) boots
A buyer for my parents’ house.
Cheese platter and knives
For Emo to find the courage to talk to girls.
A short winter
For my Grandma’s new-found cancer to go away.
Godiva chocolates
Wooden spoons
A [...]
Sometimes I think about how I spend the majority of my day, my weeks, my years; and it can get a little disheartening. When I was a little girl, I wanted to grow up to be the person in the zoo who took care of the baby tigers. Yes, I was that girl with all [...]
My youngest brother and his girlfriend are hurtling toward that heartache of heartaches: the holiday break up. Who of us hasn’t been there? Who of us hasn’t asked, will we stay together through Christmas? Do I still buy the all-out present even though I know it’s probably over? Do I put on a brave face [...]
If this doesn’t say “Eff you Angelina and your stretch-marks from having my skeevy-stached ex-husband’s babies after he cheated on me with you,” I don’t know what does.
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Okay, so this one is a cake walk.
Just as Chicago, like a proud parent, stood tall with its burgeoning 2016 Olympic bid, not to mention the deliverance of one Barack Obama; we’ve been swiftly brought back down to earth by that old ball and chain: political corruption.
Thank you, G-Rod, for reminding us where [...]
