Nic Narrates

My lease is ending- again- at the end of September. My landlord wants to know what my plans are for renewal. So do I.

Kit is likely moving away. Not, like, California away, but in Chicago parlance, he might as well be (especially with me now being sans car). He’s fixated on the suburbs.

And so it is. We’re caught in the crossroads of a life-changing decision four years in the making. And it’s scary and sad because while he may be moving, “we’re” not.

I’ve spent these four years patiently living as a nomad between our apartments. I’ve struggled to keep up with my laundry and dishes and bills and grocery shopping whilst spending on average 5 out of 7 days a week at his place. And I just don’t want to anymore.

I want to get on with my life. Our life- and its laundry and dishes and bills and groceries- together.

And I want to feel excited about that. About our mutual choice to live together, about finding a place that we both like, about decorating and planning, and inviting our friends over. But I don’t.

How should I feel, and more importantly what should I do, when the man I love seems to be dragging his feet, desperately trying to put off the grudging inevitable?

Filed under: cohabitation, crossroads by Nic